Since Japan recently won the Women's World Cup, it's appropriate to discuss the close ties that Hasidic Warriors have with our funny little brothers and sisters.
They've been going through tough times and I think the best way to support them is to remind them of our deep, shared history.
Centuries ago, Hasidic Warrior merchants traveled to distant lands. They visited the Japanese, as well as those other countries with people who look just like them.
Anyway, when the Warrior/Merchants sold their goods, they signed forms to indicate quality and authenticity, and no one dared to counterfeit them for fear of Jewish reprisal.
These Hasidic Warriors used the symbol of the circle, which the Ancient Greeks called "kyklos", but its known to us as a "kikel".
While others derived derogatory terms from this, the Japanese were so enamored with us they adopted the symbol of the circle as their own flag. They colored it red, like blood, because of the legendary combat skills of Hasidic Warriors.
Our influence on the Japanese culture extends even further.
For example, we have the Star of David. The Japanese decided to homage our great warriors by creating the Shuriken, their Ninja throwing star.
During Hanukkah they asked us about our Menorah, and we explained to them that we were G*d's Chosen People, that He had gifted us with the largest penis of all races. The 9 prongs on the candelabrum represented the minimum length of inches that a Hasidic Warrior possessed.
In turn, the Japanese refined the weapon known as a Sai, which has 2 prongs.
Now I know what you are thinking. What about Black people?
Allow me to educate you with this.
